Talking to kids about Alzheimer's is easier when you share the book “Weeds in Nana's Garden” with them. A beautifully illustrated and child inspired story that allows you to help them understand in a kid friendly way.
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More than 10 million Millennials are providing unpaid care for a friend or relative. The SCAN Foundation has launched the campaign, #YouGiveACare? to assist them with a community of like minded people who are empowered by knowledge and taking on the responsibility of caring for a loved one.
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Blue Hydrangeas is a beautiful novel with a truly important message. When a spouse has Alzheimer's we want to do everything we can. Sometimes, that requires rethinking our lives and getting creative.
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We've all had the experience of not remembering. As we age some of us dismiss this as part of aging and some of us fear it's the first sign of Alzheimer's. How do we know who is right?
Experts say that mild memory loss is normal as we age. Occasional forgetfulness does not mean you're developing Alzheimer's. If we're concerned about developing the disease, have normal memory lapses we easily focus on what we're forgetting. Knowing the difference between normal memory issues and memory loss we should worry about is tricky.
Our brains are capable of creating new brain cells at any age so significant memory loss is not normal. Brains are like muscles and need to be kept strong just like the rest of our bodies. Lifestyle can have a huge impact on the health of our brains. What we eat, and drink, how much exercise we get, how well we sleep are all important factors into brain health. The other is to regularly challenge our brains by learning something new. Anything that forces you to “think hard” or forces you to really concentrate are good for your brain.
Normal Forgetfulness VS Dementia
Occasional lapses in memory are normal, not a warning sign of Alzheimer's or dementia. If you find yourself with some of the following memory issues you'll want to get checked out immediately.
Forgetting names of people you just met or calling one person by another name?
Do you occasionally forget where you left things like glasses or car keys?
Occasionally forgetting an appointment or walking into a room and not remembering why?
Are you easily distracted or have trouble remembering what you just read or the details of a conversation?
More frequently being unable to retrieve information that's on “the tip of your tongue”
It's time to consult a doctor when memory lapses become frequent enough or sufficiently noticeable to concern you or a family member. This is not the time to pretend all is well. Early intervention may allow you to have more good years than not so call the doctor and have a FULL workup scheduled. The traditional pen and pencil memory test which usually takes less than 10 minutes may not be sufficient to detect a problem.
Reversible Causes of Memory Loss
Memory problems don't automatically mean you have dementia. There are many reasons why you may be having cognitive problems. Some reversible causes include stress, depression, poor sleep or even vitamin deficiencies. Some prescription medications may also have side effects that cause memory issues. This is why seeing your doctor is so important.
The 10 Warning Signs of Alzheimer's
On this episode of the podcast I talk to Vicki Tapia about acknowledging when our parents need help Her experiences as a caregiver to her parents and how she coped led her to writing a book. “Someone Stole My Iron” offers useful information from experts in the field of Alzheimer’s research, personal lessons learned along the way, and ideas/tips for managing the day-to-day ups and downs of dementia. It is a story of holding on and ultimately learning to let go, transcending the pain and turmoil to discover love and compassion. “Someone Stole my Iron” chronicles her Mothers determination to navigate the confusing and terrifying world of memory loss.
You'll find our conversation full of personal struggles that are universal and our approach to them educational. Together we cover a lot of ground on caregiving challenge.
My Favorite Things Page
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A common caregiver struggle is the lack of support from family members. Author Irene Olsen and I discussed potential solutions during our conversation on this episode. Irene survived to be an Alzheimer’s caregiver…twice. Her father, to whom her novel is dedicated, was the first family member. Then, Irenes' sister-in-law, diagnosed with mixed dementia a month after her father’s death, became the second.
Why An Alzheimer's Novel?
Feeling her experiences as a caregiver were meant to go further than the confines of her own heart and using her background as a care group facilitator and a state Ombudsman Irene created a supportive novel Requiem for the Status Quo.
Irene's goal in writing Requiem was to encourage and educate those called to take on the role of the family caregiver. Irene's brother was an extraordinary caregiver for his wife. Irene was the go-to person for advice, direction, and the occasional caregiving day. Having been front and center on her father’s three -year Alzheimer’s path gave Irene an “edge” on experience.
Family caregivers are often ruthlessly challenged by uninvolved family members who are quick to condemn, but reluctant to offer assistance. Caregiver struggles can be devastating when their decisions are challenged or questioned. Family members not actively participating in caregiving sometimes give advice as a way to “help”.
Fearing getting “sucked in” is a common reason others don't help more when caregiving is needed. Find out what each person feels they can help out with, giving them an active role in caregiving. Physically caring for an aging person is not something most of us are “hard-wired” to handle. Thus, allowing families who can't participate in hands-on care to tackle other tasks is a huge benefit to all.
Involving Reluctant Family Members
Involving family in caregiving can be quite a challenge. It's an issue that's been discussed before on my podcast but worth revisiting regularly. Many family members, feeling they are not cut out to handle day-to-day care, opt-out of helping altogether. Lacking nearby proximity is also a common excuse. So, how can we help them help us?
First, ask them what tasks they can comfortably tackle.. Are they good at making phone calls to doctors, specialists, etc? Can they handle deciphering insurance paperwork? Maybe they can handle things like yard work or managing paid care providers.
There are more tasks to be done than 1 or 2 people can handle. Finding one that each person is best suited will go a long way in maintaining caregiver health. Being the “lone caregiving more solid” is putting yourself on a dangerous path.
Assuming the responsibility and full burden of care, many people march forward disregarding their own health. Eventually, this badly wounded soldier is no good to anyone. In reality, it takes an army to effectively manage the care of an older adult. Failing to let others help with the practical burdens, results in a health and wellness declines.
Not anticipating how overwhelming tasks will be handled is a major source of caregiver stress. Having others who can help anticipate and find solutions to things like incontinence, heavy lifting and wandering are important. Both urinary and fecal incontinence are among the leading causes of nursing-home placement. A small or frail wife of a big man who needs help is another tough scenario.
Tips for Caregivers Who Lack Family Support
Lacking proper support, caregivers have more difficulty ensuring their loved one receives the care they need. Regardless of why there are ways to help yourself in your caregiving.
First, find out what resources are available. Before I started this podcast I was unaware of how much support is available. Connect with your local Area Agency on Aging. They can familiarize you with the available options. Also, check the many options listed on my resources page. Start with the Alzheimer's Association. They are a wealth of knowledge.
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